alone

I don’t want to be alone tonight
I don’t think I’m safe tonight
I don’t want to be alone tonight
With no one here to hold me tight
No one here to tell me it’s all right

With no one watching over me
I just might take my life tonight
I shouldn’t be alone tonight
But she isn’t here again
When she comes home
In my body will my soul reside?

Who will save me from myself?
When no one is here to take the knife
I don’t want to end my life tonight
Though I maybe dying tonight
I would rather be crying
But as the night envelopes
And my darkness enshrouds
Drag the blade across my skin
It is only a little sin
The crimson tears flow

I don’t know what is wrong
All I know is to this world I don’t belong
This body I detest, just won’t rest
My masochistic mind won’t cease to exist
Now it puts my will to the test

The pain pulses through me
Bring the pain, it is better than nothing
Bring the violence, without it it’s all the same
The pains all I got tonight
But tonight it’s all I need
As long as I’m not numb anymore

The pills seemed to be placeboes
No more will I pollute myself
With the doctor’s magic potions
No more pathetic pills

I watch as my life withers away
With pen in hand
So much left unsaid
And all I can bear to say
Is I love you, and I’m not afraid

No not again, I can’t handle this
No more monotony
No more melancholy
Just one cut to bring me back
To bring me back from numb

It isn’t my fault
I don’t want to be dead
It isn’t my fault
I’m numb, again
It isn’t my fault
It’s all in my head
It is my own fault I’m alone
Just leave me alone

I don’t know what to say
I am getting cold
It is getting late
Alone again
There is no stopping fate

These crimson tears
They from a pool of blood
My world falls in to shadows
Everything fades
Nothing left but phantoms

There goes the knife
Can’t even hold it tight
Just one last breath until my embrace with death
But with it let me say
I don’t know what I’ve done
I’m sorry
And I Love You